Tai-I-Wan Trip! Day 3

The roads of Taiwan are a game of chicken. Drivers pull into the next lane without signaling, and switch lanes willi-nilly in intersections. Want to cross the road when the green man is flashing? How dare you. There are cars waiting to turn. Keep eye contact so they know you're going to cross, and you best move that ass. And yet, there is order in chaos, and we haven't seen any car accidents - or even heard the sound of a car horn - in the week we were there. Not once. Looking at how they drive, I initially thought that Taiwan drivers are horrible. Now I'm much wiser, and realise they may in fact be the best drivers I've ever seen.

And their motorcyclists travel in packs. After spending a week here, I saw a lone motorcyclist on my last night, and I swear it feels odd.

We found a cab company along the streets of Ximending that specialises in tours.

They have several suggested day-tours for attractions located in the outskirts of Taipei, but you can change the order (and skip several attractions) to suit your itinerary.

We booked an 8 hour tour (TWD3500) to bring us to 九份 (Jiufen) and 十分 (Shifen) districts with a chatty cab-driver. After she learnt that we hadn't had breakfast, she told us there's a well-known porridge place a few minutes drive away. She suggested driving us over there for breakfast, and she'll start the clock only after we had some food.

(On the drive over, her phone rang, and she took both hands off the steering wheel to reach for the phone. All four of us immediately reached for the seat belts.)

We had trouble reading the traditional Chinese characters, but we managed to coast along. I had no problem identifying the characters "招牌" (Signature dish) though.

Their signature dish, 紅烤肉.

We got a vegetable that we supposed read "young bamboo shoots" in Chinese. EJ ordered a dish, which he assured us was squid meat. When his dish came though, it tasted nothing like squid. It was really weird, and knowing Chinese cuisine, I had a feeling it was probably was pig uterus or something. No one touched it after I voiced that out loud. We finally took a closer look at the menu, and told EJ that character meant "shark" and not "squid". It's shark meat. The dish instantly tasted better.

Foreground: not pig uterus after all. Background: suspected young bamboo shoots. Conclusion: Our Chinese suck balls.

We headed off for 十份 (Shifen) after breakfast. On the drive over, we spoke with the affable cab-driver about the recent spat of insipid Taiwanese dramas airing in Singapore like Ai and Ye Shi Ren Shen, both made by the same director, starred the same cast and had over a thousand episodes each. She wrinkled her nose and said normal people don't usually watch those shows, and they are targeted at the older generation. I knew I liked her. The middle-aged lady cab driver told us to guess her age, and we were surprised when she told us she's nearing 60.

She also brought us up to date with Taiwan's entertainment news. Like for example, Ko Chen-tung, the male lead of 2011 hit movie You Are the Apple of My Eye, was caught in a drug-bust with Jackie Chan's son, and has since been black-listed by major productions. Unfortunately, she didn't know where Luo Zhi Xiang or Jolin Tsai lives. I asked. Not like stalking is a crime...

Okay, fine. Stalking is a crime. But I'm only planning to hang for five minutes outside their house. Surely that doesn't count.

There were a few bottles of coffee rolling around the boot of the cab, and she stopped the car and brought some out for us. I was a little apprehensive about drinking it initially, probably because I grew up on true-crime TV shows and had a paranoid upbringing. But when I got over my paranoia, I tipped the bottle back to sample some of the smoothest, richest coffee I ever had.

(I got over my paranoia by checking the safety seal on the coffee bottle, and then squeezing the bottle in various positions to make sure there wasn't any holes from where someone could have injected stuff through the bottle. Even then, I took only a couple of sips. Then I drank lots of water to dilute the drink. Okay, normal people don't do this. I may have a problem.)

Photo by EJ

We arrived at Shifen to a light smattering of rain. I wondered about the wind, but she smiled and told us if our paper lantern catches fire, it is a sign that "heaven is telling you your wish will be granted very soon." Which is a really nice way to think about it.

Shifen Old Street consists of two rows of stores, and a railway track running through between the stores. Between the train intervals, the stores selling paper lanterns conduct brisk business with tourists right on the railway tracks, cheerfully ignoring the "Do not step on the railway" signs all over the tracks.

Here we are, not breaking the law because we can't read Chinese all that well - sounds like a great defense.

Ever since You are the Apple of my Eye's scene depicting the main characters lighting a paper lantern, Shifen has enjoyed a record number of tourists. You write a wish on the paper lantern, and set the lantern afloat into the sky. The lanterns were colour-coded: Orange is for Wealth; Yellow, career; White, life. Because our parents taught us to prize efficiency in all things, we chose a lantern with a different colour on each side.

It was much larger than I expected, and it was a beauty.

We were done with pictures, and were just about to depart when I was seized with a sudden pressing concern: do they have fireworks for sale?

The answer to that question is YES. You just have to talk to the storekeeper about it. He says it's totally legal, and I'm the trusting sort. He probably just likes to keep the fireworks hidden because it's more whimsical this way.

He suggested a couple of locations suitable to set it off, and even loaned us a lighter. We went to the bridge nearby and waited for the crowd to thin.

The cab-driver helpfully pointing out which way she's going to run.

I only appreciated how beautiful this bridge is afterwards, when all the other tourists scattered away like leaves in the wind. Who could have ever anticipated that a small box of fireworks has the effect of chasing all the other people away? Most remarkable. And people tell us fireworks would be a waste of money...

Because it was on the way, the cab-lady suggested that we stop at Houtong, a Cat Village and local tourist hot-spot. It was a coal town that had been stagnating for much of last century, until some tourists stumbled upon its burgeoning cat population. Today, it thrives as a tourist attraction.

Unfortunately, the wet weather caused the cats to hide under shelter. We saw a few cats wandering around, but most of them were in nowhere to be seen. As the Chinese phrase derisively goes, the town 只有几只小猫. Pun intended.

There was a souvenir shop, and we spent an inordinate amount of time in there at the behest of the ladies. Singaporean readers is going to love me for saying this: remember whenever Chinese New Year is around the corner, every supermarket like to play cheesy CNY songs sung by kids who're all badly out-of-tune? They drive me crazy. I don't mind the probably-centuries-old faux-cheery lyrics, but I could never get why they chose a chorus of tone-deaf kids. This store has a similar playlist, except it was playing Christmas songs set to the mewing of cats. They say cat-ladies are crazy. But after spending half an hour in the souvenir shop, I can see how cats can drive anyone crazy.

(Not a big fan of cats. Can you tell? I was promised monkeys. The name of this village was 猴硐, or Monkey Cave. But there were none to be seen. The monkeys probably couldn't stand the souvenir shop either.)

We went to Jiufen afterwards, where our real shopping/eating began. It was built along a steep mountain, and the cab stopped at one of the garages that operated along the road. The garages here earn money by squeezing in as many cars as possible into their space. As we got out of the cab, we watched open-mouthed as a young man got into the driver's seat of the cab, and reverse-accelerated the huge cab into a space thisclose between a concrete wall and another customer's car. He slammed on the brakes not a moment too soon, and ended up perhaps an inch away from the brick wall. He could barely open the door a crack to exit from the car. He was done in 10 seconds. Dayum. Initial D ain't got nothing on this guy.

The first order of the day was food, and we found a table at a taro dessert store.

Award-winning taro balls

Before we came to Taipei, none of my friends spoke a word of Chinese. Nada. But after 3 days, everything has changed. R finished her portion first, and skipped towards the balcony telling us "我先去拍照." A taro ball may have fallen out of my mouth.

We also bought some wild boar sausage from this store name below, which was amazing.

I deliberated for a long time before buying these red bean desserts. I wanted a taste, but my initial judgement was right: they were just too filling, and not tasty enough.

The store-owner is really hamsum though. It may or may not tipped my judgement.

We also found a popiah-like dessert that contains ice-cream. We were clammoring to take pictures of the process. One of the workers stopped halfway and placed his half-done work on a plate to make it more presentable for us. Mucho appreciato.

We also shared a bowl of spicy salted snails.

I hadn't had 茶叶蛋 (Chinese Tea Leaf Eggs) (TWD10/egg) in a really long time, and so we bought some. They were pretty good. I missed the small sign besides the owner, which tells customers that they're welcome to use the tongs to choose and pack their eggs. Otherwise, I would have reached for the bottom eggs, which would be more flavourful because they've been floating in the 茶叶 for a longer period of time.

I passed on Hanlin, the inventor of Taiwanese milk tea, and instead opted for Cold-filtered Drip Iced Coffee instead from another store.

Adding a shot of some French cream-alcohol to the coffee.

One thing about Jiufen is that there are no dustbins to be seen anywhere, but the cheery storekeepers here would take any wrapper from you, even though it's not from their store. This type of hospitality and civil-mindedness is really impressive. We passed by a tea-shop, and the saleslady told us effusively "[It's] okay if you don't want to buy any tea. You can drink some of our samples to 降热 (to balance the oily food)" She even took our rubbish off us. I didn't intend to buy any tea until I took a sip of her Oolong tea. It was hands down the most fragrant Oolong I had. We shared 6 boxes, and I ended up with 2 boxes. Which, as I got back to Singapore and started brewing some for my family, I learnt that 2 boxes are not nearly enough.

With our stomachs filled and our inner-shopaholic satisfied, we turned our attention to more creative pursuits.

Wow. I wonder how did they end up like that.

We spotted some cute dogs all suited up on the top of a flight of stairs, but I had a feeling it'll be harder to rearrange these

The winding climbing stairs along the streets of Jiufen are definitely not suitable for everyone. Although it makes for some amazing views.

There was a tearoom selling aged Chinese tea, and they do demonstrations on tea brewing. Judging by the elaborate interior of the huge store, as well as the rows of charcoal-heated teapots, they take their tea really seriously.

All the way up at the top of the hill, after many many stairs, we spotted a primary school. God, imagine climbing up and down this hill every single school day. The kids here must be fit as fuc.... a fiddle. Fit as a fiddle.

With Jiufen all wrapped up, we returned to Ximending. It was about the 7-and-a-half hour mark when we arrived, and our driver insisted that she couldn't charge us for the last 30 minutes. I was pretty taken aback by her generosity.

Because holiday is no time for relaxation, we dusted off our behinds and traveled to Raohe Night Market via the metro. E could read maps well, but not Chinese. I'm more familiar with Chinese, but I'll stare at a map for ages and still walk off in the wrong direction. We make a great navigation team. Or a horrible one, depending on your perspective. Still, we found our way in the end.

There was a famous temple just around the corner from Raohe Market, so we took a quick detour into the Song Shan Tzu Yu Temple, a temple that worships Matzu, the goddess that protects seafarers. It is one of the most visually-impressive - and elaborate - temple I had ever been in. Definitely a must-go, especially since it's so close to Raohe Market.

The start of Raohe market has a really crowded store. Like any kaisu Singaporean, we joined the queue (first priority) and then tried to see what the fuss is (second priority).

They were selling baos with peppered meat wrapped inside a skin of dough, and then baked. Watching the workers go about their specialised tasks so efficiently was strangely therapeutic.

The pastry is baked in this oven. The bao somehow all stick along the walls of the circular oven.

This Hu Jiao Bing (Pepper pastry) was good. We were lucky to get a fresh batch just from the oven, and bit into the crispy bao skin. The meat was juicy, though a little too peppery for my taste.

The grilled squids from this store was excellent as well. One of the best I've tried.

I needed something sweet and refreshing after, and I spy a dessert cart. These QQ balls are surprisingly addictive, and I wanted more when I was done.

I also spotted a beautiful set of Chinese chess. I was almost ready to buy it, until I converted the currency in my head, and realised a full set would cost $80. (They package -and price - each set of army separately.) Although it isn't very expensive for house decorations, I was a little startled by their prices. I have to admit, I have a little difficulty seeing Taiwanese currency as real money. Everything is priced in 10s, 20s, 50s, and 100s (and there isn't a denominator less than a dollar). It feels just like monopoly money to me. Luckily, I held back this time, and walked away before my resolve wavered.

Such beautiful, beautiful pieces. They'll look lovely in my room. Stop it Calvin.

We took a circuit of Raohe Market before heading back to Ximending. Because we hear that going to bed on a full stomach was a bad idea, and mostly because I really really wanted a massage, we went to a massage parlor in Ximending. I was a little leery about the massage parlor, but it looks really posh and E's mom reassured us that it was a legitimate massage parlor. Still, I was in the middle of the massage when my masseuse asked whether I wanted 'extra services'. Naturally, not a single other person got approached by their masseuse except for me. Maybe it was my ham sup lo face? I've got to work on that.

Many of these photos here are courtesy of EJ Yeo, R Wang and J Lee.